When we were kids back in the 70s in the dusty streets of Katanxa, there was no cooler sound than that of tate Kambou, the first black traffic officer on his bike riding up and down the street! Now as creative as we were as snot neus, dusty ankles kids from the kasie we loved to create our own little interpretations for stuff. As tate Kambou’s bike’s siren went off pie-po-pie-po we would add a sound track to it that said peno-oumba, peno-oumba loosely translated as ‘’ trouble is coming , daars k*k’’! Now you see, as a kid there was no better sound than that, Kambou getting off his bike at Die Grootwinkels walking like a real Herero chief with that ka’chesta walk of his. I’m not sure if he’s still alive but he surely gave us an identity. Yes, both him and Tjikukubanda, the first entertainer I’ve seen in my life, RIP. Now that was the 70’s, rolling down to 2019 that pie-po sound is the most k*kest sound you can hear, because of 2 things. One, you either getting pulled over for drunk driving or two; you have outstanding traffic fines , warrant of arrest goede! Nou mense, its really none of your business as to in which category I’m falling, bly in jul baan asb! But since I am a law abiding citizen sobiso I just want to tell you guys out there breaking the law, ahem! Ja, they are coming for you vakwetu! Mbuae Mukuru, how can these people seriously go that far by saying that they will start visiting us at our offices and houses? I still remember this a few years back at my office at Trustco, daai bliksems het my kom haal. They were standing in front of me reading my rights goede . The one officer was giggling while reading my rights whispering under his lips ‘’ ja nee, groot name’’. Ek het amper sy moer gevloek mara since I knew I was in deep k*k, I had to maar behave mos. Nou mense, before this happens to either you or me again, let’s find a few ways to make sure they never ever catch us .
Go to the toilet at least 7 times before lunch. Come on, in those 7 times they must have been there trying to find you.And please sound surprised when your colleagues ask you where you were!
Tint the board room windows to make sure they can’t see you while they scan the office for your face, organize bogus management meetings. Come one, we have to take this company forward!
If they come to your house, hide under the bed …during klopjag days of die Boere, that’s normally the safest dumbest place .
Let your wife do the talking at the door, my kids would say I’m hiding in the toilet, die dom donners! Currently I’m on a good wicket with mevrou, if not she would give me up plus accuse me of emotional abuse , esses man! Unfortunately, these new spietkops are way too gangster for Kambou …they don’t pie-po pie-po anymore . Bliksem, mxm!